BLOG

I feel curious

Thu, 19 Aug 2010 10:58:16 +1200

Every so often I come across a project that speaks to my interest in celebratining human interaction, story telling and technology. This one certainly does that. You too will see why I feel curious about how the world is feeling right now and how long it will be before you are curious too? Once you've watched the movie, go and play at http://www.wefeelfine.org/, it's fascinating. Thanks to Justine for sharing this video. It's funny, we must have been on the same wave length tonight. I saw Justin's tweet about this TED video, excitedly I wrote this post and then found he'd done the same. I think that perfectly sums up exactly how powerful an idea this is. Enjoy. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

When Empathy Goes Bad

Thu, 01 Apr 2010 01:51:28 +1300

Wikipedia describes Empathy as the capability to share and understand another's emotions and feelings, and is characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes". This connection to others is both an honorable and natural feeling, but can also often drive us to do something that, is the completely wrong thing to do. Since joining the Fire Service I've seen many situations where peoples empathy for another has not only caused them to be unable to render help, but on occasions has actually put everyone in danger. In a blog post the other day Seth Godin talked about empathy and asked marketers to not assume they know how people are feeling emotionally. His logic was that unless you had had the same experience, how could you know how a person was feeling and that it was therefore dangerous to pretend you do. I agree with this, but in a stressful, high anxiety situation, peoples imagination and emotions can run away on them if the environment is not managed and if people do not control their own state. As we grow, we develop a strong natural empathetic response. It's that feeling that makes us want to rush over and help someone we see struggling, or aid someone in pain. The problem is, if we get caught up in that emotion - we actually lose the ability to help. What I've discovered, partly through training and partly through observation is that there is a space (a period of time) between the stimulus (what happened) and your response to it. For some people that time doesn't seem to exist and they react so quickly, so the challenge is to take a deep breath and take as long as needed to respond appropriately. 'Feel' but don't get caught up It's important to have empathy and show compassion, but you can't get caught up in the emotion of the situation. You help best when you are totally present and strong. What's your role Be clear, "what's my role in this situation", and respond appropriately. At the scene of a car accident it would be a natural instinct to want to help a crying child first and remove them from the situation and give comfort. But to remain effective we must control those feelings, and do what is right. To solve an emotional situation effectively there should be a process that works best The same situation we see on the Fire Ground exist in normal life. To be effective in our jobs, our businesses, and our families, we need to learn to have empathy without over reaction, this allows us to assess and then act in the most effective manner. If not the situation becomes overwhelming and we lose both our clarity of thought and the creativity required to solve the problem at hand. Empathy can become an addiction It feels good to be connected emotionally to people, but it is not always best to be like that. Build a strong emotional muscle to help guide your response as It's a lot easier to assess and react to a situation by looking in 'at it' rather than when you are 'too close'. In business we're required to make big decisions in stressful environments, think strategically under pressure and set an example for our employees. Don't go running into any burning building without taking a minute to control your frame of mind. Cheers, Stephen. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Crazy Dancing Guy Creates a Movement

Thu, 01 Apr 2010 01:42:06 +1300

Derek Sivers did a talk at TED about this crazy dancing guy and what we can learn from him in terms of leadership, and more importantly about the importance of the first few followers. "If you want a movement, a leader needs the guts to stand alone and look ridiculous". What you really need however is the first few followers, you need to nurture these people as they indicate to the masses that following is ok. Because they help to establish momentum, we need to love and embrace our followers as equals. In the video watch a movement happen in under 3 minutes as Derek dissects some lessons ... BTW This video was shared by the very inspiring Brian Johnson of Philosophers Notes fame. I would thoroughly recommend them for those interested in this sort of thing (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

6 wealthy guys and what they taught me #3

Fri, 16 Oct 2009 05:32:02 +1300

'How did you become so wealthy?' is a question I've asked plenty of people in my life. But the answer I got from a very successful colleague of mine when I worked at Xerox wasn't about a product, or a service, or a sales or marketing strategy. It was about a belief that underpinned everything he did. His answer was this. "I got rich by making other people rich... I add value to peoples lives." He took it upon himself every day, to go out and add value to peoples lives - whether it was his clients', or his customers' or his friends'. Now you're not necessarily going make people rich simply by adding value to them, but by believing you can add value in a way specific to your industry, the wealth in whatever form it may be, will follow. Let me use Queensberry as an example. We add value to our customers by doing three things: 1) Helping our clients make more money - by differentiation 2) Saving our clients time - by offering to do their post-production work or providing tools so they can do things more easily 3) Giving our clients with a better experience than anyone else If our clients don't feel like we deliver on at least one of those areas - we may as well not exist and we wouldn't be flourishing if you didn't add value to your customer's lives in some way. You need to express your care in a way people will value I wrote a while ago about how I demonstrate my love for my wife Sonya by turning her light off for her each night. I do this because I know that she likes me doing it. The same principle applies in business. It's our job to understand how our clients like to be loved and what makes them tick. Then we can go the extra mile and add value in a way they didn't even know we could. At Queensberry, we know it's simply not enough to just add value to our clients' (Photographers) lives as they are not the end user. Their Brides and Grooms are the ones turning the pages of our albums, cherishing the memories and emotionally connecting with the story they tell. It's our goal to add value to them also by providing a treasure that they can remember their day by and hand down through the generations. If we do it right, we might even provide Brides and Groom's with an experience better than they had on the day. Their album is a reflection of the detail, the emotion, the love, the family, the venue... most of which is often just a blur. We're adding value to our clients, by also adding value to theirs. Be clear how you add value to your clients The challenge is to do it in an authentic, respectful and in way that honors people, and real value is only really provided when it's perceived as of value from the other persons perspective. When a Bride and Groom cries when they open their album for the first time, or when our product helps a photographer up-sell to their clients, or when we can help a photographer spend more time with their family by doing some of their work for them - we've added value to their life in a way that no marketing or sales strategy could ever achieve. Cheers, Stephen. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 11:25:30 +1300

Take a few minutes, sit down, switch off, listen and think as you watch this ... share it with your kids and consider your own life ... deeply cool. From the YouTube Video "For complete lyrics, audio and video clip please visit PersianDNA™ Website at http://www.persiandna.com/4u.htm Wear Sunscreen is the common name of an essay, (actually called "Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young") written by Mary Schmich and published in the Chicago Tribune as a column in 1997. The most popular and well-known form of the essay is the successful music single released in 1999, accredited to Baz Luhrmann." (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

My Regret

Mon, 03 Aug 2009 01:10:32 +1200

My regret if I did have one would be around business projects I didn't take a leap of faith to take advantage of. I don't however believe in regret as each part of ones life is purely a "step". None of us are perfect, and often we will trip. So long as we get up and do our best to put right what we broke, everything is good. If you like, all these moments become learning's ... they weave the colour and texture into the blanket we call life. I've always been proud of coming from a very entrepreneurial family, and one that has been astute at picking trends. #1 In the early 90's after years on Compuserve I discovered the web through that service. It was slow and horrible, so I wanted direct access but that was usually only available through the universities. Any way after telling my wife that "This is going to be huge", and after months of negotiating access and developing a business model so that others could also benefit, I went back to my day job. As we all know, we call them ISP's now, and the people who didn't get comfortable got very, very rich. It's interesting to note that many people that did start ISP's in the early days were kids in Mum's garage, who didn't yet have much to lose. #2 When working at Xerox my father and I developed a piece of software called Patch Manager (I still have a copy of my proposal to Xerox). As I read the Larry Ellison book Softwar and heard about the development of the Oracle Business Suite of products, I realised the thinking behind ours had evolved similarly, and was years before it's time. Xerox went on to spend millions on an alternative option that seemed in many ways a knock-off of our original idea. Although I believe that option was completely inferior, it was picked up by many corporates around the world. My boss, however, said that I was "an Account Manager, not a software developer" and made me get back to work. Unfortunately I was young and wanted to keep him happy rather than take a risk. I wonder if we had continued would we be an SAP or Oracle today? #3 In approximately 1997 I started a website called Photojunction for our industry where "everything photographic" came together. Long before anyone even thought of social media and social networking we had a site where photographers could share links, do reviews, rate sites etc. Although limited by the technology of the time and way off what is available today, it had the potential for a real community to develop. The problem was photographers at the time didn't have computers :-) We were caught in The Dip, with lots of other work to do. With a rapidly growing export business, we closed the site down (we kept the name though!) Even in our industry the sites that have filled this space are large and by my guess very profitable. Being first is only useful if you "stay in the line". Anyway life is like that. You make choices and move on. Sometimes however making 'good choices' involves not being scared, not trying to keep everyone happy, taking risks and going for it. No regrets though. I am excited about the journey we've had despite these learnings. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Trust

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 01:25:41 +1200

Without a doubt the currency of the Fire Service is Trust. Without it all emergency services, and especially the Fire Service, would struggle to operate. I am sure it's true in all countries that the Fire Service almost always tops the chart of "Most Trusted Occupations", and I'm very proud to be a part of an organisation with that quality. This is important, not just between us and the public but also amongst members of a crew. Our job can be dangerous and you need to be able to rely on the people you respond with, and your ability to trust their integrity and courage is essential ... If not, "Who's got your back?" Stephen Covey in his book "The Speed of Trust" says that transactions that occur where trust is high happen faster and cheaper. We rely on this when on calls to allow us to take control and get the job done quickly and effectively. This point can be demonstrated by contrasting two stories: Scenario #1: One day I responded to a call directly from home to a young woman having a serious asthma attack. I arrived about 6 minutes before the rest of my crew and therefore only had myself, my uniform and conversation to make a difference. She was Status 2, which basically means "really sick", but on arrival you could see a definite sense of relief from the family along with a look of desperation from her for me to do something quickly. The important thing here was that my uniform, which clearly displayed Fire Rescue, gave me immediate credibility with her and her family. If I had turned up in a pair of shorts and a tee shirt, time would have been wasted explaining who I was and building that trust. All I could do was build on that trust by showing empathy, confidence and gaining her focus and talking her towards a more controlled mode of breathing and relaxation. This was an extremely dangerous situation for her, but as trust was established immediately I could be effective without wasting time. Of course when I saw the uniforms of the Ambulance Paramedics, I was relieved myself because I knew I could trust them, and because they had the necessary drugs the woman so urgently required. Fast forward a couple of months to Scenario #2. I was again responding directly to a call from home. On arrival I found a man in cardiac arrest, but after a very short period of CPR his heart beat returned. So short a time in fact that I thought I must have made a mistake. Again I was awaiting my crew and without monitoring equipment. My instinct however was that the situation was cardiac, despite his wife's insistence that he had too had had an asthma attack and collapsed. A short while later a Paramedic arrived and my uniform, combined with my uncertainty, worked against me. I wasn't the expert, the Paramedic was, and as a result I lost some of his trust. He disregarded my diagnosis and focused on the asthma with little effect. I don't blame him for this, I was a little uncertain; but still, the ambulance crew didn't take my advice seriously because I was "just a fire fighter", as opposed to being a "fully trained paramedic". Later that day, while on another job with that crew, they told me I'd been correct and the man had in fact had a heart attack. To me, the business learning is this... Trust does speed up transactions and reduce their cost, so don't under estimate its power. But you can't just demand Trust, or talk about it to get it. It must be earned and nurtured. It will not occur in your organization because you ask for it, or because you talk about it at meetings... Trust is subjective... Trust is based on gestures, symbols and behaviour, not just words. Do you live and work with integrity? Does trust ease your transactions or do you abuse relationships by talking about values you don't live up to? Where you give trust to people or organizations, is it deserved and are you clear what to "be trusted" means? In the following video, you'll see fire crews working together as teams in extremely challenging and dangerous situations ... It only works where trust exists... What will you do today to improve the level of organisational trust you have so that you can go to the extreme together tomorrow? UPDATE 11th July 2009 Just read this great post by Justin French on Trust (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

When she stole my heart

Sat, 11 Jul 2009 09:53:17 +1200

SPEAKING OF LOVE AGAIN : The other day I wrote about how my wife knows that I love her: because I turn her light off. Literally thousands of people have read that post since then, and the general theme is, the women go, Ohhh and the guys go, Dude sssshhh. :-) I have received so much direct comment, I thought I would share how such a strange thing came about. The simple answer is : I have literally loved this woman since the moment we met. We were individually told that we would be perfect for each other, and, as we thought that was ridiculous, we each spent the next few months avoiding each other and fighting the "setups". Anyway one day, not knowing who she was, I saw her walk across the room at a party and all I could say to myself was "WOW". She was beautiful. She had this fluid movement when she walked, and I was transfixed ... the search for me was all over from our first conversation. She was confident, clever, funny, and I was in love, literally from that night ... In fact I evidently told her niece this when I picked Sonya up for our second or third date. That was in December and we were engaged in February. If our meeting felt like a fairy tale, our relationship at times, however, has been a bit more of a challenge. She has lost both her parents ... Her brother took his life a week or so after our wedding ... She left her family when we moved to New Zealand so that I could follow my dreams ... and I can be difficult to be with. I get engrossed in things, especially work and can get distracted for months on end... Sadly, at times, despite her loving and strong spirit, life is hard and I only ever want her to be happy ... To borrow a saying from my uncle ... "She's my girl" I guess this is summed up in the saying "Love is a condition where another person's happiness is essential to your own." It's been over 18 years now, and we've always been in love. I guess like all relationships there have been ebbs and flows as we've grown apart and then back together again ... She has cared for me and dedicated her life to me and my family. So it's actually very simple ... If I love her so much, and she has done so much for me ... waking up, getting out of bed each night and turning her light off seems the very least I can do to make her happy and to say "I love you" (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

The Umbrella of Rapport

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 04:36:51 +1200

Imagine if there was something that, if you did it consistently, would improve all relationships completely. Wouldn't that be amazing? I don't want to overstate it, but I think the concept of the "Umbrella of Rapport", might just be that powerful, so please enjoy. Today I came across some notes from an internal presentation that I did for our sales people last year on how they might improve their relationships, in this case with our clients. Part of it included this powerful idea. I don't take credit for it, I first heard it from Tony Robbins, but I have added my own thoughts below. In my opinion the price of entry in business today, includes a number of things without which you won't even be considered. These are: - Being professional - Being trustworthy and reliable - Being educated - Working hard - Having a plan for success To stand out you need to do even more, which is where rapport comes in. SO WHAT IS THE UMBRELLA OF RAPPORT? Essentially it's the idea that you must base all your interactions around the idea of building and maintaining rapport ... If you do, life is good, if you don't you get wet. Imagine for a moment that you aren't in a negotiation, but you are the gentleman above walking with his partner. For both of you to share this umbrella he must assume the responsibility of keeping both of them dry, not just himself. Life is generally the same, in that we must all take responsibility for the rapport we have with others, and not take it for granted, because as soon as it's broken relationships become strained. So let's look at this example from a few different perspectives. What if ... - One is party is small and the other big? Suddenly we have different needs, these needs must be honored. - One person is walking fast while other wants to go slow or stop all the time. We all know that this can be really frustrating, but if it's a fact we must allow for it: otherwise this is a guaranteed way for one of you to be wet and pissed off. - Whose responsibility is it to maintain rapport, who is in control? The person holding the umbrella (running the negotiation) or the other person. The truth is we both need to take care. - What if you must break rapport? Maybe the man decides he must run for the car. Maybe in life everyone's needs can't be met, or a difficult message needs to be delivered. Is breaking rapport justified and how might it be recovered? - Who sets direction? - Who must be the most careful? Image how your marriage might be if your first goal was to love and honor that person, to build and maintain rapport before trying to meet your own needs. You would suddenly see that we travel at different speeds, have different needs, and both must work at communication. Image if you "loved" your customers, or should I say treated them with love, making rapport the central goal first, before the sale? What would those relationships be like, what would being at work be like? Sadly I think most of us are fairly careless when it comes to the rapport we have with others, myself included at times. We are successful often due to good luck rather than good management, and that's what makes this concept so powerful. If you dare to be different, if you dare to throw your heart into your relationships first, you stand out as a shinning light in comparison to everyone who's just going through the motions. Further Reading Rapport in education Rapport in sales In dating ... Please forgive me for this example :-) Rapport with your coffee I hope you enjoyed this, I'd love to hear your own stories and what you think, how about sharing below? (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Why?

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 02:34:30 +1200

Why is it that people spend so much time asking how, and so little time asking why? Did we as kids run out of some predetermined number of "Whys" we had been granted? I know my kids ask me constantly, why dad?, but why? ... Why after why, after why? Nothing unusual, I am sure you did it to your parents, I know I did it to mine ... The question is why did we stop? I am often asked for advice about starting a business, and in the early days would jump in and try to help. I'd give support, and maybe some direction, until I noticed how few people actually did something. I still helped, but only if the person was genuinely committed, as I had become frustrated with this inaction. But then I realised what the reason was. I started asking questions "Excellent, why?" ... A blank look is returned ... "Why, do you want to start a business?" ... "To make money ... and get rich" ... "Why?" ... "Why what? ... "Why do you want to be rich" ... "So I can give my family a great life, so that we can have stuff" ... "Why do you want that?" ... "So that we can be happy." But that's failed logic At this point I understand their desire, but I also know I am talking to someone that is not going to be an entrepreneur ... In fact they are probably never going to be truly happy until they find a better answer to "Why", and until they learn to ask why for themselves. You see, it's a failed logic, money won't make you happy. In fact maybe all this person needs to do to be happy is to lower their expectations about money, to build a story around why they don't need money, why money is wrong and why working that hard would take them away from what's important ... like family. The truth is however, that won't make them happy, that will just make them numb. Happiness will only come through connection to a higher purpose ... if you, like "one's destiny" ... it comes from contribution. At the end of this post I have linked to an interview with entrepreneur Michael Hill (Jeweller) from a National Radio show this morning. He made an awesome comment that I believe supports this:"When you are in harmony, you don't want to take, you want to give." Observation #1 Have you ever noticed how many successful blogs are about how to be a successful blogger?. And if they are not about blogging then they are often a "how to" site, maybe with tech tips etc. What about these for example? How to become a popular blogger or How to become wealthy right now and 5 ways to 'systemize' your blogging. Before I start a fire storm, I'm not criticising these sites. I think they are awesome and have great stuff to share, but what about the question ... Why? ... Why do you want to be a successful blogger? Why is this information right for you? Written goals a good, but they are exponentially more powerful when you add a 'WHY?' to each item. A deeply considered and deeply felt why ... a deeply considered connection to that higher purpose. These blogs will give you a strategy once you are moving, but this connection to purpose will be the fuel for your fire. Observation #2 I was at a course last week, and sat for most of the week at the back of the room. I noticed that a large proportion of the room were hurriedly writing notes, trying to take down every detail – they needed to make sure they captured the strategy perfectly ... A smaller group didn't take many notes, what they seemed to record was not the strategy verbatim, but ideas that connected with what they already knew ... they recorded the inspiration. What I found interesting was: the group that took the notes hadn't started a business yet or were struggling. In fact many of these people, without wanting to be unkind, will probably never start. They are trying to educate themselves a safety net and of course without an empowering "Why", no safety net will ever be good enough. The second group however, didn't need a safety net as they were so well connected. They had turned their 'why?', into a 'why the hell not?' as if to say, 'what else is there?' I guess I am reminded today If we want to change our destiny, if we want to change our life's direction, if we want to grow beyond where we are now then we must always explore why? NB I came across a blog recently that I am starting to love called mixergy.com. What I love is how Andrew really trys to dig deep in his interviews, sometimes to the point of making the interviewee a little uncomfortable. He passionately explores the 'Why?' behind what the person does, and do they live what they 'say'. Have a look, I particularly enjoyed these two interviews, one with Seth Godin on Why You Need To Lead A Tribe and How Alltop Is Growing By Following Its Founder’s Advice – The Guy Kawasaki Interview Interview on New Zealand National Radio with Michael Hill Jeweller (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

In trouble on twitter

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 01:56:03 +1200

I found myself in trouble on Twitter this morning ... ok "in trouble" might be a bit strong, but a tweet I received did make me realise something I was doing was causing offence and of course don't want to do that. In my "Direct Messages" (inbox) I received the following tweet. At first I thought #DM meant "Deep and Meaningful" ... what no deep and meaningful conversation?, what a weird thing to say ... but then I realised more seriously that they meant "Direct Messages". So what happened, and why is this important? juhasaarinen seems like a pretty cool person. Certainly they have an interesting blog, and write good articles. I followed them as I wanted to follow their tweets, and I guess they followed me in return. All good until this point. The problem was I use a service call Tweet Later, and had set up an 'Auto Direct Message' to say "hello and thank you for following me", in it I pointed harmlessly to my blog. Tweet Later is a service for managing your tweets, and other twitter activity. As I got busier on Twitter, and the number of people following me grew, I found it more and more difficult to respond and say thank you in a timely manner. I thought it more polite to send an 'auto thank you' quickly than attempt to send a personalised one knowing in most cases I probably never will. I realise now that's wrong. Twitter is about a conversation, I joined and love it because I get to connect with our clients who are photographers, my friends and people in the Wordpress community ... actually anyone that wants to say hello. Auto responders might be efficient but they aren't personal and they aren't about conversation or entertainment. With Twitter being overwhelmed with spam, it also sends the wrong message about who you are. So my thanks goes to juhasaarinen for this reminder ... DM Auto Replies are now turned off ... Tweet Later however is still helpful in many other ways." Having said that, is their response being short sighted? I don't want to give with one hand, and then take away with the other. The learning is certainly appreciated, but I do think the response could be a little short sighted. If something about my profile made the "follow" worth while in the first place ... is an instant "un-follow" necessary. Of course I respect their right to, and appreciate that setting standards is important, but I think a persons previous updates and blog etc says a lot more about them than a single #DM message. Which brings me to another service I enjoy Twitalyzer is really interesting. It allows you to review, at least from Twitalyzer's perspective, your behaviour on Twitter. The Idea of Generosity is clearly important in a conversation as it shows how much you contribute. On Twitter this is done by sharing information (links) and by re-tweeting (RT) others. I'm therefore reasonably happy with those figures. I don't care to much about velocity as I spend as much time there as I want, and don't want to spam my followers. The 1500 tweets a week, that this is measured against seems exceptionally high so question if this measure is set realistically. In terms of 'clout' and 'influence', I guess we all want to have some influence over the people we communicate with and therefore took most interest in those being so low and that's where this service has so much value. If I cared about influence, and wanted to be a "Twitter Star" then it tells me

I Took The Vow

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 01:46:16 +1200

One of the things I love most about my job working in the wedding industry is the feeling of love, union, and joining together of people, families and our collective story. Sadly some people think that because we are ambitious business people and work hard that, we are all about business and nothing else. The truth is that our connection with humanity is deep and our love of people precious to us, therefore when I came across this website "I Take The Vow" I was moved by the the organisations ambition to have 100 million people take a vow of Non Violence In Their Thoughts, Their Speech and of course Their Actions . Imagine how the world would change, if those people actually did do this ... Will you take the vow? From the website: On November 7, 2008, at 9:45 am, the 500 people attending the Alliance for a New Humanity Human Forum in Barcelona took a vow for non violence in their thoughts, speech and actions. Each person decided to ask other people in their lives to join them in taking the vow. The goal then became to create a global movement, which would mobilize 100 million people to make the same commitment. We, at the Alliance for a New Humanity believe that if a critical mass of people commit to this vow, the world would be transformed. If you are seriously committed to peace, join us in this global movement and take the vow. Love, Deepak Chopra President and Founder of the Alliance For A New Humanity For more information click here, better tell me what you think below, and please re-tweet this to twitter. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Are you a Pleaser?

Wed, 20 May 2009 11:05:03 +1200

I came accross the following statement on Deborah Day Poors website tonight "Pleasers have good hearts. They are willing to give much, and all they want in return is for everyone to be nice. However, their best attempts to please and create peace backfire. They end up leading chaotic, hectic, hellish lives." It's hard to find a truer word said. In fact, I was at a Tony Robbins event, "Date With Destiny (DWD)" on the Gold Coast last month, and this concept of being a "Pleaser" was central to many peoples problems. One guy had it so bad he affectionately became known as "Pussy Boy" I certainly have spent much of my life as a "Pleaser", trying to keep everyone happy. The problem is although this is done with good intention, as your life gets bigger and more complex it becomes more and more difficult to keep anyone happy, and especially yourself. Anyway, I have been very lucky, not only have I been able to attend events like DWD, but I also received one of my greatest learnings from the Fire Service. That is that safety is an inside out responsibility me > my partner > the team > the public > the patient And so through these experiences I have discovered that what applies in business, "that you can't be all things to all people", is equally true in life ... you must first be the best, and happiest version of 'you' that you can. From there you will be in the strongest position to serve and only then will life be full of passion. Please don't get me wrong, I am not talking about being selfish or purely self serving, I am just talking about balance. Life is always more satisfying when you focus on what's outside of you, but you must also learn to look after yourself along the way. Learn to say no! I've not read the following book, but I'd suggest it's a great concept and an important issue. I have never met Deborah, and don't get any remuneration for this suggestion so please take this suggestion as being heart felt and I trust you will enjoy. Her book is called "Peace at Any Price: How to Overcome the Please Disease". Let me know what you think by leaving a comment below ... If you're in a hurry maybe you could "retweet" me so people on twitter get this message too. Thank you. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Part of the Problem or the Solution?

Wed, 20 May 2009 09:15:40 +1200

A few years ago while attending a Leadership course in San Diego I saw a presentation by Gary King. It was incredible, not only did he talk from the heart, but what he said was profound in it's simplicity and as he touched my soul he changed my life. At that event he issued, and I accepted, a challenge ... that challenge was called the "The 24 Hour Truth Challenge" It was hard, especially as 24 hours turned into a week, then a month and now a couple of years. I have learnt a lot about myself during that time as I did find I told some little white lies, as I think we all do. More importantly however I suddenly realised how often I didn't "say" the truth for fear of hurting people, and I kept things to myself. I kept my 'mouth closed'. Think about that, it's pretty profound when you suddenly realise how much the breaks have been on in your life because you weren't expressing yourself completely. I learnt there is no such thing as an 'inconsequential lie' and decided that starting with myself it must stop ... I had to learn to say what needed to be said, and I had to go back and say things to people that I should have been said earlier ... it's been a challenging but also an incredible and wonderful journey. Maybe I'll talk more about that more some other day, but the Power of Truth was my introduction to Gary and I don't want to get distracted. Anyway, I was at Date With Destiny as a leader last month and got the opportunity to hear him speak again and there was absolutely no way I was going to miss that, as he has become a bit of a hero to me. In that presentation he told us of an experiment he does... "He drops a piece of crumpled paper on the ground, stands back and waits for someone to pick it up." Sadly no one does, ok maybe a few per hundred do but most people look, step over it and keep walking, thinking it's someone else's problem. Now here is his suggestion ... It is, that you are either Part of the Solution, or you are Part of the Problem, stepping over the rubbish is part of the problem. I for example used to say to myself ... someone will pick it up ... it's someone's job, but Garry is right. By that simple justification I am actually making it ok to litter. I am not taking a stand and saying NO. I am not setting a high standard ... I am actually saying, although subconsciously and unintentionally, it's ok to drop rubbish, someone will pick it up. I am not doing his point justice, but this is not just about a bit of trash, the same concept applies every time we choose not to engage whether it be to stop littering, violence, abuse etc ... we immediately go from potentially being part of the solution to being part of the problem. Anyway, in perfect Gary style he leaves us with another challenge, that is for the rest of the seminar to think about his words every-time we see some rubbish. grrrrrrrr Hours, have turned into days, which have now turned into weeks :-) I used to walk Dylan (the dog) around the neighbourhood every morning and notice the birds in the trees and the sun rising, but as soon as I got back I also started to notice the trash along the road. Not a lot, but enough to not be able to ignore it. I'm embarrassed to say, I did try to. I didn't really want to be walking around picking up litter and Gary our neighbourhood has a school thrown in for good measure ... But I couldn't ignore it, as his words started to scream in my head PART OF THE SOLUTION ... OR PART OF THE PROBLEM? So I started to pick up the rubbish, not everything, but enough each day so I felt like I'd done my bit. The plastic bag I carry around for the doggy mess, has now become a garbage bag to. Actually it's started to become quite satisfying. The streets look better as the litter is all gone, it's kind of like tending to your garden as progress is made little by little ... Actually it's strangely relaxing to look after something that goes beyond the bounds of ones own front gate. So now I pass on Gary's challenge to you, are you going to be .... Part of the Problem or Part of the Solution? Good luck, have fun and of course let me know how you go below ... how about doing so even if just for a week. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Loving each other in-spite of ourselves

Thu, 14 May 2009 10:04:36 +1200

On Wednesday night we had a fantastic night out with Johannes and Jo and a few other friends which included seeing The Eastern play at the Wonder Bar in Lyttleton, Christchurch. They were pure magic. Anyway long story short The Eastern and some of their friends from Oregan played a John Prine song called "In Spite of Ourselves". I really do love this song. It' funny, it's a great piece of music but most importantly I love the underlying message. "In-spite of ourselves, we'll end up sitting on a rainbow , against all odds honey, we're the big door prize" Isn't that so true, that the best relationships thrive, often in-spite of ourselves. It's not perfection that makes us attractive, it's the odd little things that make us unique. Please enjoy John Prine and Iris DeMent singing "In-Spite of ourselves". Ok, Back to the Eastern. What a great band, they rock. I'll definitely be there with friends when they are up in Auckland at the end of February. Here is a photographic piece Johannes did for them which we profiled Queensberry's blog last year. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Be The Boss

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:39:17 +1300

If you are in or running a disfunctional team, maybe it is a simple as people do not know who is the boss? Not an unusual situation but one that needs to be quickly and consciously resolved. Here I share my experience with this in the fire service and what can be learnt from it. One of the things the Fire Service does exceptionally well is make it clear not only that there must be a boss but also who that person is. In an emergency situation, control needs to be quickly put in place and priority given to the tasks needing to be completed. Your OIC (officer in charge) might be your best friend at the weekend but on the Fire Ground he is boss, and you do as instructed immediately and without question. Every Fire Service uses similar methods to make it clear who is in control on a Fire Ground, from the color and markings on helmets, clearly marked vests, right down to where people sit on the truck. If you ride in the front passenger seat you had better be prepared to take responsibility when you get off the truck ... simple. What happens when simple rules are ignored? One day a couple of years ago we responded to a head-on motor vehicle accident. Unfortunately no officer was available and we were a crew of four firefighters of the same rank. On arrival the place was a mess with serious injuries in both cars, traffic backed up and members of the public trying to be helpful but in the way. We all jumped into action doing what we thought the best use of our skills, but without a clear boss. The guy in the front hadn't demanded control and we hadn't expected it. Fortunately things didn't go too badly, but it certainly became clear, as other services arrived, such as Ambulance, Police and additional Fire Trucks that we were not in control. Everyone was looking for status updates, starting with "Who's the Boss?", and we didn't know. In business things are no different, there needs to be a boss, and there should be no question who that person is. An organization needs someone steering the ship, allocating the resources and establishing priority. Something to think about: How is that going in your organization? What's going well and what needs to change? Please share your thoughts below. What is leadership to you, and do you agree there needs to be a boss? (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Have Persistence in Negotiation

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:37:24 +1300

There is a saying "Get in Line, Stay in Line", basically it means if your start something keep at it until the end. Some people however give up just before the finish line. Below I share what we can learn from Kids when it comes to persistence in negotiation, once you start don't stop. Does No really mean no? Some children left to their own free will, can out last an adult in a verbal argument or negotiation. Kids are built with the extraordinary ability to stay focused on the goal and be so much more persistent than we can be bothered being. This hyper negotiation can happen angrily during a tantrum or seductively as the child pursues the idea of a new bike. Parents tend to have three strategies to deal with this #1 - Ignore it, hoping it will go way. But you get what you tolerate ... NOT GOOD #2 - Diversion: This is good in that, if you can distract a child, it often allows the child to let go long enough to forget the goal ... Effective. #3 - Dominate them: Basically where you try to assert yourself against the child and make it do what you want. Often aggressive, and in some situations violent. This isn't a game and it's not a negotiation ... Basically it's my way or the highway. Why is it that we treat our children like wild horses and over the years do all that we can to break them? In the interests of our sanity, peace and quiet, but most importantly the approval of our peers, we effectively crush a child's spirit. You must do all you can to keep that energy and persistence alive, to nurture it – it should be our goal to mould and direct it, not break it. The same thing applies with employees. When you employ people they should bring something new to the table. It can be frustrating at times but you need to keep their energy alive and celebrate the challenges. In Seth's book The Dip he talks about the need for persistence through tough times. Why, if this skill is so important as an adult, would we not celebrate and encourage it in our children. Anything else only has short term gains. How do you handle the "persistent" employee in your business? Which of the three techniques above do you use? How is that serving you? Could you try something else? To read the stories in this series so far click here (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Does marriage have a lot to answer for?

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:28:03 +1300

Does marriage have a lot to answer for? Hmm, good question. Personally I don't think so, but it does bring its own set of challenges. My belief is that relationships, whether with family, friends or lovers, "ebb and flow", a bit like the tide, and this means they need constant attention and will change over time. Like everyone, Sonya and my relationship has had its high points, but also some low ones. Currently things are absolutely wonderful and the low points long forgotten. The interesting thing, however, is, at their 'worst' relationships have the opportunity to become their 'best'. Why? Well, because you have nothing more to lose. - why not say what hasn't been said before? - why not deal with the issues that have been bothering you? Often the things we fight about are not the things that are really the issue; they are just a symptom of a much deeper issue. The question is, do you have the courage to say what needs to be said, and the strength to listen? I was reminded this morning of a number of mentoring situations where I have been asked to give guidance to a small business in serious trouble. It is amazing how almost always the fundament issue comes down to a conflict between the owners, or the owner and their spouse. It isn't that the business isn't viable but that there is a difference of opinion between the couple, or that they each have a very different tolerance for risk. When asked by some close friends to help them review a business they wanted to buy, I spent more time convincing them that they needed some "rules of engagement" than that they needed a good plan. I knew they were extremely capable and the business would come naturally; I just needed to make sure they both were clear on their own "risk profile" and how the long hours of work would impact on their lives. If you are having issues in your business, are there issues at home that need to be resolved before you can prosper? Maybe you need to spend some time reassuring your spouse that things will be ok, or just possibly you need to suck up a little pride and admit you need some help. At the end of the day you also need to know, who is going to be the boss Just my 2 cents worth on this beautiful morning. What are your thoughts? (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Camaraderie is the soul of a business

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:27:14 +1300

Recently I wrote about mates being awesome, and the best thing about joining the Fire Service is the camaraderie that comes with it. Honestly, I have never been involved in anything that has such a strong sense of community, and that holds the value of "having each other's back" so highly. It is an incredible organization for that reason. Our company, Queensberry, also has an amazing culture that fosters the feeling of one family and of looking after each other. We are very proud of the fact that, in all the past entries we've had in the "Best Places to Work Awards" we have been in the TOP 10, and we put the result down to our feeling of 'oneness'. There is lots of documented evidence of the value to an organization of a "tight" team and camaraderie. Of course we know that it takes time and effort to build these bonds, and although it can be very difficult the payoff potentially huge. I raise this today however as a note of caution. Being too close can turn from an asset to a liability when things go wrong, especially if you have weak leaders who fail to differentiate between friendship and the needs of the business. You must always, in business, socialise and be friendly ... foster the feelings of family and community. But you must also retain authority and be the boss. Don't let the informality of friendship slip over into the work relationship as it is so so hard to get discipline back once lost. Be careful... How are you going in your business? How are the boundaries? Do you have a good relationship with staff ... Too easy on them or too hard? (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Sharing the love people

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:18:55 +1300

So leave a comment and tell me ... Would you get a hug? I would (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Influencing our children

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:17:08 +1300

Good morning all I think this video speaks for itself. This is an Australian Adveristment, reminding us that the way we behave has a powerful effect on how our children behave and the person they become. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

What does your heart look like?

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:15:53 +1300

I found this a little while ago and thought it a great reminder of what it is to love and be loved. Dance like there is no one watching and love like you'll never get hurt ... It's more fun that way. What does your heart look like? (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Life goes on

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:12:55 +1300

It's a sad fact that the only thing we know with certainty in life is that one day we will die. Despite this certainty, a lot of people will be affected by the loss, the only question being, by how much and in what way? It's a sad fact that the only thing we know with certainty in life is that one day we will die. Despite this certainty, a lot of people will be affected by the loss, the only question being, by how much and in what way? Will our passing give cause for celebration, a time to remember the wonderful times together, or will our passing be the beginning of the end for someone else who can't focus on anything but our being gone. One of the unfortunate things about being in the Fire Service is that you get to be there at the point someone passes, you observe a family's anguish and fear, but you don't get to see the resolution of this over time. It's there and then it's over. One surreal experience I had was going to a call where we were couldn't revive a lady using CPR, then rushing home and 30 minutes later being at a comedy movie with my kids. I wasn't really in the mood at the beginning, but I had promised the kids we would go, and we had lots of fun despite, I guess, the extreme anguish of the husband I had just left... For the rest of the world "Life Goes On". I don't say this to be insensitive. Of course I feel deeply for the people in these situations, and in my own family we've had more than our fair share of pain. It is however a basic reality and there's a similar situation in business. When you're running a business it's hard when a key staff member decides to leave. It's not the same as someone dying but many of the emotions are similar. Fear of the future, sadness at not continuing the journey with them, not knowing how to do what that person did, a deep feeling of loss. The question is not will people leave a business, but when. There are at least 3 things required to deal with this ... #1 A contingency plan: what will I do if that person does leave? #2 Make sure all your eggs aren't in one basket. That is, make sure that in all teams more than one person knows how to do each job. #3 An acceptance of the fact that this is a natural part of the cycle of life. Treat it as an opportunity for change and review how things might be even be better. Celebrate their having been here and the exciting challenges they move on to. I'm never happy to see someone leave our companies. It causes disruption and I'm kind of selfish. I'd like them to want to stay and I miss them when they're gone. It is however a sign that I'm employing people who care about themselves and are looking for a life full of challenges and experiences, just like me. I'd love to hear how you deal with people leaving your business, or dealing with loss generally. How about letting me know in the comment section below. (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Am I Self Righteous or a Hypocrite

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 12:09:48 +1300

Hmm "Am I Self Righteous or a Hypocrite"? LOL I put that as an either or ... but on the weekend I was accused of being both ... Ouch that hurt, but like all things it got me thinking. I think we all are, from time to time, at least to a small extent, and I certainly leave myself open to being accused of both because I take a public position on things. The truth is this: I am certainly a long way from perfect and I have a lot to be embarrassed about and a little to be ashamed of. I have done lots of stupid things, made lots of mistakes and have hurt a number of people along the way. I regret these mistakes, would like to have been cleverer and wish I could take back the hurt. In my model of the world, however, that means I have something to teach, not a reason to feel guilty and keep my mouth closed. We have all made mistakes. Some have stolen from their parents, cheated on a test, lied to a friend and known it was wrong. I think however that these are also learning experiences. The question is what do we do with them? I'm not perfect, and I certainly don't know everything. What you read here is just an opinion. But I have lived. When I make a mistake in business or my life generally I want to be able to share it, as hopefully someone will avoid making the same mistake and more importantly pay the cost. I share for two reasons ... One is to teach ... If a few people each day get a new distinction I am happy. Like my post yesterday, if a man thinks a little differently about how he could honor his wife, or a wife more clearly expresses how she needs to be loved, then I would smile. The other reason is to hold myself to a higher standard. Being public gives me leverage to hold myself to a higher standard, a personal thing but very beneficial, at least to me. Please, take what you want, and laugh at the rest ... but most importantly be open to something new. Thank you for reading, and please share your thoughts below. Your friend Stephen PS Oh ... and of course blogging is about sharing your story, and people do it in different ways ... like The Honest Truth. Look at the photos of New Zealand (my home) on her blog here ... amazing (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);

Thank You Thank You Thank You

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 11:42:36 +1300

LOL Ok Woo Woo moment coming up ... :-) "Choose to be Optomistic" - Dali Lama I've been given two wonderful gifts in the last few years, one being an understanding of the power of truth and the other the power of gratitude. I have to say I'm a long way from perfect, and that it was a lot easier to hear about these than it was to take advantage of them, but I can attest to the confidence they bring you. TRUTH: There is incredible power and strength in the truth, but sadly more and more society justifies "white lies" as part of life, but think about this... Those who think it is permissible to tell white lies soon grow color-blind. ~ Austin O’Mally The Five Levels of Truth-Telling: First, you tell the truth to yourself about yourself. Then you tell the truth to yourself about another. At the third level, you tell the truth about yourself to another. Then you tell your truth about another to that other. And finally, you tell the truth to everyone about everything. ~ Neale Donald Walsch Conversations with God (Book 2) Gratitude: So many people focus on what they don't have rather than what they do, but unfortunately the result is a feeling of weakness. Focus on what you already have and what you are grateful for and you will realize that you already have all that you need ... From here you will feel powerful, and make good decisions. I have a friend who has arguably lost a lot this week. I hope that she chooses to focus on the fact that she now gets to live away from the lies people have perpetuated around her, and that her life is still full of wonderful things. It is my desire that she focuses on what she has, and not what she has lost. We love her deeply! (function(window, $) { if (!$) { return; } window.qbInitSectionShells = function(root) { var shells = $(root || document).find('.qb-section-shell'); var prefersReducedMotion = window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches; var parallaxShells = $(); var observer = null; $(window).off('.qbSectionShells'); if (window.qbSectionShellObserver && typeof window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect === 'function') { window.qbSectionShellObserver.disconnect(); } window.qbSectionShellObserver = null; shells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var animation = shell.attr('data-section-animation') || 'none'; var trigger = shell.attr('data-section-animation-trigger') || 'scroll'; var isParallax = shell.attr('data-section-media-motion') === 'parallax' && shell.attr('data-background-type') === 'image' && shell.attr('data-background-layout') === 'single'; shell.removeClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); if (prefersReducedMotion || animation === 'none') { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } else if (trigger === 'load') { window.requestAnimationFrame(function() { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); }); } else { if (!observer && 'IntersectionObserver' in window) { observer = new IntersectionObserver(function(entries, instance) { $.each(entries, function(_, entry) { if (entry.isIntersecting) { $(entry.target).addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); instance.unobserve(entry.target); } }); }, { threshold: 0.2, rootMargin: '0px 0px -10% 0px' }); } if (observer) { observer.observe(shell.get(0)); } else { shell.addClass('qb-section-shell--visible'); } } if (isParallax && !prefersReducedMotion) { parallaxShells = parallaxShells.add(shell); } else { shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); } }); if (observer) { window.qbSectionShellObserver = observer; } if (!parallaxShells.length) { return; } var updateParallax = function() { if (window.innerWidth < 768) { parallaxShells.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', '0px'); return; } parallaxShells.each(function() { var shell = $(this); var shellElement = shell.get(0); if (!shellElement) { return; } var rect = shellElement.getBoundingClientRect(); var viewportHeight = window.innerHeight || document.documentElement.clientHeight; if (rect.bottom < 0 || rect.top > viewportHeight) { return; } var distanceFromCenter = (viewportHeight / 2) - (rect.top + (rect.height / 2)); var offset = Math.max(-38, Math.min(38, distanceFromCenter * 0.12)); shell.css('--qb-section-parallax-offset', offset.toFixed(2) + 'px'); }); }; $(window).on('scroll.qbSectionShells resize.qbSectionShells', updateParallax); updateParallax(); }; $(function() { window.qbInitSectionShells(document); }); })(window, window.jQuery);